Episode 13, Does Your E-Mail Get Dumped?

Aren’t lists wonderful? Morning drive radio is full of lists of the top ten this or that ad infinitum, most of it for your entertainment and mine. However this blog is for your enlightenment and not entertainment. Getting dumped is not funny! Even if it’s just your e-mail that gets dumped, trashed, deleted or worse yet, sent to the junk mail folder. So you are smart enough not to use dirty words in polite conversation why not avoid nasty turn-offs and alarms in the subject lines of your e-mails?

In real life you can get dumped for a lot of reasons. You can get dumped because of the way you dress, your personality, your income, your lifestyle, your conversation and YOU WILL KNOW YOU HAVE BEEN DUMPED!
It’s a little different in the cyber world.
Here are some categories of subject lines to avoid as if they could cause a catastrophic pandemic.

Special Offer,
Free, act Now, Be Your Own Boss, Money
100% free; 50% off; Act now1; Apply now: Contains $$$; $$$$$; Deep Discount! Double your money, time, investment, etc.; Double your income; Earn big buck, $, extra cash, huge paycheck! Easy terms; Low monthly payments! Eliminate Debt; Extra Income;
Fast Cash; Financial Freedom: FREE; Free Access: Free Gift; Free Info: Free Offer: Free samples! Get Out of Debt: Loans: Lower your mortgage rate! Lowest insurance rates! Make Money! Work from home! Be your own boss! Cash Bonus! Credit! Need extra life insurance? Mortgage! OFFER! Home Based! Refinance!

The infomercials on these subjects are myriad. Your potential customer wakes up in the middle of the night to them, shudders and heads for the bed from the couch. What makes you think that your e-mails will fair any better.

Flea Market!

Hello! Do you really want that clientele anyway? They want it cheaper, more of it and don’t care about quality as long as they can get it for fifty cents. Personally I would be insulted to get an e-mail like this from you.

All words that relate to sex or pornography –dah!

Let’s go a little further, though: hot, Levitra, Viagra, Increase your size; Stimulate. Satisfaction, Cialis—When the moment is right, your prospective client will hit DELETE.

All words that related to cures or medication:

Valium –I get enough junk mail about medications that sometimes I might think I need a valium but I don’t want your e-mail about it.
Vicodin—Right! I know you are a pain already!
Xanax—if I didn’t have you bothering me with this inanity, I wouldn’t need a calmative!
Herbal—I already have a Chia pet in my window!
Lose weight—the scale already tells me that, don’t need an e-mail to remind me. What’s next, a talking scale that says, “Good morning, fatso?”
Medicine –Right now, you are being a pill, don’t need anymore!
Online Pharmacy—this makes me wonder if a margherita and a tattoo across the border comes with this e-mail!


All superlatives:
Amazing, that was one of the first words my 24 year old learned when he was two!
You're a winner! I am thinking to myself, how could this person possibly know THAT!
E.x.t.r.a. Punctuation—Get a life!
Winner! Lottery! That is strictly Third World country mentality and that’s usually where it is coming from.
Anything that looks like you are YELLING!
Capitalization and huge letters are a big "no, no" here or did your twelve year old forget to tell you that as she was chatting on line to her friends.

Commands:
Avoid! Buy! Call now! Click Here! Collect! Compare! Consolidate! Get! Instant! Limited time! Lose! Not Spam! Now only! Only! Open! Don't delete!
When someone tells me, “do not delete this e-mail,” guess what I do? These words remind me of the sixties song, Signs, Signs, Everywhere Signs!

Personalization
—HOORAY FOR YOU, YOU KNOW HOW TO USE MAIL MERGE!
Biggest tacky and scary technique: Your family, Your own, Dear Friend, For only, For you, Friend, Hello
The next thing I am waiting for is a home invasion or a pop up that says, “Congratulations sucker, I just shot your computer with an AK 47 Virus Gun.

As seen:

As seen on Oprah; as seen on TV; g a p p y t e x t; Hidden
“Oh, Lord, I just fell asleep at the computer and I am dreaming that the television infomercials have invaded it.”

Information you requested
—I am expecting a major spam attack, spy ware or a virus here.
In the same vein: Online degree: Online marketing; Opportunity; Promised you; Removes; Reverses; Search engine listings; Serious cash; Starting with a dollar amount;
Stop or stops; Teen—I am waiting for the FBI at my door on this one!
Undisclosed recipient –This is like the plain brown wrapper that is used to mail unobjectionable material.

Suggestions:
Be real, be inventive and considering the trillions of words in the English language, try to be creative, sincere and tell the truth and how about this? Develop an e-mail list that is specifically yours and that you have permission to use and then if you backslide into the cyber gutter which uses all of this crap, hopefully those prospects who know you will not mind.

If you'd like the audio on this please listen to the archived version of "Monday Morning Marketeer" at: http://www.talkshoe.com/talkshoe/web/tscmd/tc/33960
Scroll to: Episode 13
© Joanne Quinn-Smith, 2007

This article may be reprinted with permission by e-mail and this by-line:

Joanne Quinn-Smith, Creative Energy Officer of Dreamweaver Marketing Associates is the host of Monday Morning Marketeer. Listen at: http://www.talkshoe.com/talkshoe/web/tscmd/tc/33960
Or find show notes at: http://marketingmondaymorning.blogspot.com/

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Listen live for fifteen minutes every Monday at 9 AM, (last fifteen minutes reserved for live or chat questions)
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Description: Short tips for things you can do to market your business from Dreamweaver Marketing Associates, Creative Energy Officer, Joanne Quinn-Smith. Inexpensive self -marketing information, 15 minutes with 15 minutes for questions. Learn to easy, inexpensive tips for marketing your business with the Marketeer!

I have also listed past(archived) episodes that you can download to your MP3 or I pod and listen to later or you can turn on your computer and listen while you work.

UPCOMING EPISODES

EPISODE19 – 12 Steps to Selling 12/24/2007 09:00 AM EST

EPISODE20 - Self content management for your website! 12/31/2007 09:00 AM EST

EPISODE21 - Tips for a Powerful Voice Presentation 01/07/2008 08:00 AM EST

EPISODE21 - How to Create a List for a Multi-Level Business 01/07/2008 09:00 AM EST



Past (Archived) Episodes

EPISODE 1 - Monday Morning Marketing, Business cards

EPISODE2 - Monday Morning Marketing—Common Mistakes Made on Business Cards

EPISODE3 - Additional ways to use your business card

EPISODE4 - Ten inexpensive Tips for Marketing Your Business

EPISODE5 - Writing Press Releases

EPISODE7 - Branding What is it?

EPISODE 8 - Investigating Personal Branding--Are you a Rolls Royce or a Subaru?

EPISODE9 - Create Your Own Brand

EPISODE10 - Brand Your Uniqueness with Your Strenghts

EPISODE11 - Branding with Creative Story Telling

EPISODE12 - Describe What You are Branding

EPISODE13 - DOES YOUR E-MAIL GET DUMPED?

EPISODE14 - Five Cost Free Marketing Ideas

EPISODE15 - So you want to consult on the phone and get paid?

EPISODE16 - Getting paid on Pay Pal


EPISODE17 - Free 800 acounts,

EPISODE18 -Enhance Your Image with Auto Responders

Generate PR for Your Business or Organization

Rebecca Lamperski, Author of Full Bloom, recent interviewee on "Positively Pittsburgh Live" used lessons that she had learned at National Associaiton of Women Business Owners lst Annual NAWBO Day during Shawne Duperon's seminar on Media Relations to generate publicity for another of her organizations, National Speaker's Association.

Reprinted from "ShawneTV Guide," a free ezinethat generates amazing news stories andconversations. Subscribe at www.shawnetv.com.© Copyright 2007 by Shawne Duperon, ShawneTV Inc.ShawneTV29558 English WayNovi, MI48377US

Lessons Learned from an Association**************************************************Rebecca Lamperski of Full Bloom, is a growthexpert. She created some pretty amazing coveragefor her local National Speakers Association inPittsburgh, under the most unusual circumstances.She was a live guest on KDKA after pitching aspeak-a-thon for the radio. Yep, that's right,the radio! Rarely will you see TV coverage for aradio event. Here's how she did it:"The success really came when I adjusted theannouncement into an external press release tosend to the local broadcast stations, radiostations and newspapers.""Taking what I had learned from Shawne, I neededa hook - a statistic or an interesting fact totie-into. With a simple search of the internet,I found a new study about how much women talkcompared to men. I added that tie-in to my pressrelease, and it was magic!""We received a call from the local broadcaststation for an interview on their morning show -and they specifically indicated they wanted me totalk about how much women and men talk. That'show I knew it was the press release that worked!"Great job, Rebecca.Here's the link to her interview.http://kdka.com/video/?id=34053@kdka.dayport.com